Translator: Flowingcloud Editor: Arocks141
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Theater 4: Horror Actress’s Friend From the Old Days!? – Scene 5
In the rain. Mansion roof.
Asashiro Satsuki recalls her past memories.
From an early age, I was praised as a clever child. Quick-witted and sociable, that I will make it big in the future.
“As expected of Satsuki-chan.”
If it’s Satsuki-chan, she’ll surely become an actress.”
It was my parents’ suggestion, who often praised me, that made me decide to take the path of a child actress. I easily passed my first audition, but the role I was given was a villain. Because it was a villainous role, my parents suggested not using my real name, but rather a stage name—Sara. I was able to avoid the role of the most terrifying ghost in the play, so I was relieved that the public’s bad impression of me would now be directed towards Tsugumi-san, who played the role of the ghost. At the time, I did not realize that there was no way I should have felt relieved.
After my debut film, “The Dragon’s Tomb”, was a big hit, I was offered numerous roles. All of them were villain roles, but many of them were important roles, such as the main character’s rival. I happily accepted them, believing that in time I would be able to play many roles.
“What a performance!”
“You’re outstanding.”
“How wonderful!”
In the beginning, that was fine. However, at some point, people around me began to look at me with malice and curiosity. By that time, it was too late to do anything about it. Even though I asked my agency for help, I could not acquire any offers except for villainous roles. I could not get rid of my bad image—that I am a villain. All I got were just those words.
Eventually, the stares and voices from those around us began to crack our family relationships. When the bickering did not stop, when their yelling echoed through the night, when objects began to be broken, and when my mother was alarmed by the violence towards me—she parted ways with my father.
From thereon, it was a series of running away. I changed my maiden name, gave up the name Sara, ran away, ran away, and ran away… but even at the end, I still wanted to make a comeback. I just wanted to perform side-by-side one more time with that person—the one who saw me as an equal.
That’s why, when she was taken away by “that incident”, I lost all hope once again.
As I changed my name, my impression, and the way I acted, the people around me gradually began to evaluate me differently. I was different from that person. I could never be like her. I don’t care about her. The overbearing self-questioning that made me claw my throat out eventually distorted me. And that weakness—That person (him) took advantage of my weakness. He listened to my complaints, wiped my eyes with his thumb as he always did, and swore to protect me.
However, in the end, he abandoned me. He abandoned us on the day when our newborn baby, Juria, first saw me and laughed.
I cannot rely on anyone.
No one will protect me.
No one would treat me as an equal.
But then, who will protect Juria?
Thus, the only way she can be happy, the only way she can not be like me, the only way she can live a life where she can always have a smile on her face—
“Don’t come near me!”
—My beloved daughter rejected me in the pouring rain.
“Juria… come back, come back here, Juria!”
My voice could not reach her. I continued to shout, “Don’t be confused!” I did not realize that I had already made a mistake long ago. My words, the words from a woman who had fallen into evil, surely won’t reach my well-raised Juria-chan.
Then, what about that girl? If they were the words from that little girl, who stood firm in the face of the wind and rain, would they be able to reach her?
“Juria-chan. Why? Satsuki-san wants you to come back too!”
Her voice was direct and clear, not affected by the sound of the rain. It’s as if that hateful woman, as if her ([past] Tsugumi) appearance overlapped with [current] Tsugumi. 1
“—off.”
“Eh?”
“My mom told me that if my friend is a bad child, I should cut them off.” 2
I gasped.
“Ah, then me?”
“No. You got it wrong. Tsugumi is always a good person.”
Ahh, don’t tell me.
“Then, who?”
Please, please stop it.
“I’m a bad girl. So—I… I need to cut myself off, or else my mom won’t look at me!!”
My punishment was being thrusted straight at me.
My selfish conduct, took the form of the most terrible punishment possible, and penetrated straight through me.
“Sorry… I’m sorry, Juria. But, it’s okay, it’s fine now!”
As if my cries were drowned out by the sound of the rain, Juria remained motionless as she looked at Tsugumi-chan. No, she was moving little by little. One step at a time, she was moving down into the valley of despair. She looked at me sharply, as if she would not let me get in her way.
What should I do? Start running towards her? What if I startle her and she falls? Shout at her in order to calm her down? No. If my voice gets drowned out by the rain, she might think I’m yelling at her and that I’ve abandoned her.
What should I do?
What should I do?
What should I do?
What should I do?
These thoughts that raced through my mind could not help me—the unsightly life I lived for 43 years. The time only continued to pass mercilessly.
What would you do in a situation like this? Please tell me, [past] Tsugumi-san!
“I see.”
—Her voice could be heard clearly even far away, as if it was strangely passing through the sound of the rain.
That was not the voice of a friend. A voice different from that of a villain. It was also different from acting like a young boy. It was as if someone completely different, filled with despair, had taken over.
“If that’s the case, then I’m a bad girl for not being able to stop Juria-chan.”
“Tsugu…mi?”
“If that’s the case, I can’t call myself Juria-chan’s friend if I don’t cut myself off as well.”
“What are you sayin—”
One step. She makes herself look as if she was stepping out, then she goes far forward as if it is sliding.
Another step. A mysterious feeling, as if the distance between them had shortened a step’s distance.
“Then, how about we die together, Juria-chan?”
She said gently in a voice so cold that it sent a chill down my spine.
The raining roof.
Tsugumi confronts Juria and immerses herself in her own skit.
In the pouring rain, the thoughts of Satsuki-san slumped on the floor and Juria-chan’s, who cried out in grief, intersected. One way or another, I understood the reason why Satsuki-san had become as stubborn as she was now and why her feelings for Juria-chan clashed. She was probably awkward about it.
However, that is no reason to hurt her, and that should not be a good reason for me, who has died and reincarnated, to intervene.
Words of apology that never reached Satsuki-san.
Juria-chan was imprisoned by despair, causing her to lose sight of her surroundings.
What should I do? What can I do to stop Juria-chan? What can I do?
No, that’s wrong. If I cannot move Juria’s heart as I am now, it’ll be fine if I become a new me that can move Juria-chan.
—Now, let’s decide on a title. Juria-chan is a kind girl. I will take advantage of Juria-chan’s kind heart and drive Juria-chan’s actions into a corner. I am a tunnel-visioned, sly girl who likes and loves her. I have decided on the program. How does “Lover’s Suicide” sound for a title? 3
(Well then, it’s the curtain call. Once more, for the sake of moving someone’s heart!)
I took a breath.
The preparations were ready.
Time to raise the curtain!
“Then, how about we die together, Juria-chan?”
—Juria-chan is about to die because her mother criticized her. I guess that Juria-chan’s mother has her own circumstances and she really loves Juria-chan. But, isn’t that an opportunity for me?
Around Juria-chan are Mimi-chan and Rin-chan. Both of them have known one another longer than I have, and they are much closer to her than I am.
“It would be lonely to die alone. If you’re going to die, it wouldn’t be lonely if we died together, you know?”
Then, what if we die together here? Mimi-chan and Rin-chan can’t cling to Juria-chan. Juria-chan will be my, and only my, Juria-chan.
I will approach her without being noticed, embrace her, and then we will fly into the sky together. Then, the two of us will be enveloped in pain initially, then disappear into the sky like angels. Ahh, how wonderful.
“Tsugumi, I…”
“Are you scared?”
“—”
“Then.”
Then, hmmm, that’s right.
Juria-chan is kind. She’s kind, so surely.
“Should I jump first?”
If I jump first, she’ll jump after me filled with guilt, right?
“Tsugumi? Wait, what are…”
I walked past Juria-chan and tried to jump off the rooftop. Ahh, what a good feeling. Even if Juria-chan doesn’t die, I will always be able to live on in her heart. If that happens, how fulfilling will this be?
“…No, don’t, Tsugumi, you can’t die!!”
I kissed my kind and gentle Juria-chan who grabbed my hand with love—no, wait, that’s not it, the act is only up to here!—I slapped the ‘scene cut’ magic words onto myself, and pulled Juria-chan towards myself. A shift in balance. A change in position. I won’t let you go anymore.
“I’ve got you, Juria-chan.”
“Eh, ah, huh, what? Wha, what’s, eh!?”
I won’t allow any resistance. When one’s torso is grasped and held to bring the weight down, a person is surprisingly immobile. This is a technique seen in ancient martial arts, in which the body is not able to exert force when the center of gravity is facing downwards. The cold rain had sapped away Juria’s strength, and she was unable to move even if she struggled to get to her feet.
And now, there was no longer any worry of her getting away.
“Juria!!”
As soon as I let go of her hand, Satsuki-san ran up to Juria-chan. Satsuki-san had taken off her slippers in order to run faster and hugged her beloved Juria-chan, even though she was soaking wet from the rain.
“Juria, Juria, Juria!!”
“Mo..m…”
She stood on her tiptoes so that Satsuki-san could pull her into her tight embrace. However, it was the end of this conflict for Juria-chan, and she did not seem to know where was a good place to put her own hand on Satsuki-san.
Her gaze swept over the void, as if she was confused. I, who was at the end of the line, simply said to her, “It’s all right,” with a movement of my mouth.
“Thank goodness, thank goodness. You’re safe!”
“Mom, are you crying?”
Juria-chan ran her hand across Satsuki-san’s cheek and gently wiped away her tears. Then, Juria-chan must have finally realized that she was crying as well. She put her hand on her cheek, then tilted her head in puzzlement.
“Why are you crying?”
“Because I was about to lose you.”
The expression on Juria-chan’s face did not change. She just felt lost, as if frozen in place.
“Why would you cry if I’m not here?”
“That’s because… I love you.”
The frozen look on her face cracked.
“But, I haven’t been a good girl, you know?”
“I don’t care. It doesn’t matter! I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry? E-Even though I’m the wrong one here…”
Then, the cracks began to expand.
“No, Mom, I am… a bad girl.”
“I don’t care if you’re a bad girl or bad girl! You are Mom’s only family. I’m sorry I didn’t look after you properly. I’m sorry I hurt you. So please, please don’t tell me you’re going to die or disappear…”
—The words broke along with her falling tears.
“Ah—so..rr..y… sorry, ahh, sorry, Mom, I’m sorry! Wahhhhhhhh, sniff, wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”
“Sorry, Juria, sorry, sorry, ahh, sorry, my beloved, Juria, sorry, ahh, ah, sorry…”
An umbrella was held out over me as I watched over the two of them. My mom smiled and held me in her arms as she draped a towel over me.
“Now then, we’re having a lecture when we get back, Tsugumi.”
“Ugh. S-Sorry, Mommy.”
“No, I’m worried about you doing something so dangerous. But, putting that aside—great job, Tsugumi.” 4
“…Thanks, Mommy.”
The rain showed no sign of stopping. But, I wonder why? It was as if the freezing rain did not exist, but a rain of salvation was pouring down from the sky, washing away any ill feelings.
“Achoo.”
If you are reading from a pirate or aggregator site, please read from the translator’s site: yado-inn (dot) com I have to put the link like this or else the bots will remove it, sorry 🙁
- Flowingcloud: The “past” and “current” parts were added by me so you can tell the difference between the two Tsugumis. They’re different kanji, but same in English lol.
- Flowingcloud: The term for “cutting someone off” is ‘きりすてろ’, which taken literally means to cut someone down aka to kill someone. We all know which meaning Juria is hinting at here. ;(
- Flowingcloud: Lover’s suicide, more commonly known as ‘shinjuu’. This is a very common romance trope in historical Japan. A lover’s suicide has been romanitized throughout history and thus has been banned many times in history due to its popularity and couples who would actually commit suicide.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shinj%C5%AB - Arocks141: no, no no no no no. Tsugumin putting herself in danger is absolutely out of the question! Lecture her well, Mommy!
I knew that Tsumugi was gonna act but I didn’t expect that lol
Of course she’s going to act. It’s just what kind of performance we get.